Sometimes you're just doomed to FAIL

I have had a shocker of a week.

Don’t you just hate it when something goes wrong and all you want to do is try and fix the problem, but your help is deemed ‘unhelpful’? You feel like a hindrance more than anything else, and worse, seen as one?

That was me on Tuesday arvo. I stuffed up on such an epic scale it’s not even funny. When I had realised what I’d done my ears started ringing like I was going to faint, my hands were clammy and I was staring into space because I couldn’t fathom what I had done. I felt like a total failure.

The thing was, I didn’t admit that I actually made a mistake. See I am a pretty proud person (I feel that this is down to the fact that I am a Taurus, which I am also proud of) and it isn’t in me to admit defeat.

I actually ended up solving the problem, which I was soooo relieved about, but I still didn’t admit that it was me who had done the fudging. I just kept my inner monologue of screaming and swearing to myself while I quietly freaked out about how I was going to fix the issue.

I guess my over helpful façade didn’t do me any favours. My guess is that I probably gave myself away.

I don’t know if I have learned my lesson. I guess I need to be more careful next time so that the same problem doesn’t happen again, but I won’t be saying “Sorry, I did that.” Call me stubborn, but that’s just me.

And today, I have just been an illiterate mess. I can’t seem to write anything down the way my brain told my hand to – it just comes out a jumbled puzzle on paper so that when I read it back, it makes about as much sense as a monkey trying to speak Spanish.

So, please don’t call me today and ask me to relay a message, because I won’t be able to take it down properly.

Some days you just shouldn’t get out of bed… but tomorrow is Friday and hopefully my luck will turn over the weekend!

x

I will remember you

On Sunday I watched a movie called ‘Remember Me’. It was devastatingly sad to say the least. The thing I took from it was that it’s important to cherish the little moments in life because you don’t know what is waiting for you ‘round the corner.

So, that night over our roast dinner I cracked a bottle of French champagne that I was saving for no particular reason. And it was so good – we sat down, drank, ate and yelled at the NRL game on the telly while wearing our trackie-dacks and Ugg Boots.

I got great comfort from being able to relish in the simple things that really make me happy. It’s sad that many people don’t stop and make the time to enjoy what they have; rather it’s all about work, or being better or richer or skinnier or blah blah blah… whatever.

I’m not saying that people should listen to me at all, or even care what I am talking about. I’m just saying, be grateful for what you have because you don’t know when it’s going to be taken away from you.

Just think about it.

At a crossroad

Okay so on Wednesday my brother and I went to Ferry Rd Markets for some lunch. Anyone who has been to the Brickworks knows that that carpark is often a nightmare to navigate on the best of days.

On this particular day, it wasn’t the drivers that annoyed me to the point where my knuckles turned white seizing the wheel, it was the pedestrians.

My basic understanding of a pedestrian crossing is a place where drivers slow down at the ‘zebra crossing’ and allow people to walk past without being flattened in an area where there aren’t any traffic lights.

As most people have got the basic concept of this down pat, why is it that while I approached one particular crossing at the Brickworks a lady decided to just stare at me, gobsmacked?

I don’t get it! You are meant to confidently walk out on to the road on the area of bitumen that was painted specifically for you as a pedestrian and cross to the other side.

This lady seemed to forget this mighty hard fact and as I approached, just stood to the side, frozen. So you can understand the slight annoyance and my sudden urge to honk loudly at her. It wasn’t until I actually waved her across that she acknowledged the fact that I wasn’t going to steam roll her.

Now she didn’t look like the type of person who had never crossed a zebra crossing before, so I would assume she knew what each individual’s role was to play that afternoon.

GAH!

People, if they day comes when someone doesn’t stop for you at a crossing, give them the finger. Until then, please please stop being so frustrating and just use crossings properly. It’s really not that hard!

That’s my gripe for the week!

Happy Friday xo

I don't wanna forget

I have been thinking about activities and such I did when I was a kid – Little Athletics, art and craft with my grandmother, going to McDonald’s parties on the weekend, dancing concerts, Blue Light Discos, and going to several Disney Dancing on Ice productions with mum.

Not to forget the lovely ensembles I wore growing up in the nineties (I was born in ’85 so there was a lot of fluro clothing, scrunchies, long scrunched up socks worn over leggins’ (not the type Lindsay Lohan wears, rather the oddly patterned stretch cotton ones from Target).

I recently decided I was going to get serious about documenting the things I’ve done in my life; the places I’ve been to, people and sites I’ve visited and the experiences I don’t want to forget. My soon to be mother-in-law and I have kind of caught the scrapbooking bug (late I know) and it’s got me hunting for long-lost photos of my past… without much success.

The thing is, I remember doing so many of these fun things growing up, but I can’t find many photos to document any of it.

It annoys me that there are probably rolls of undeveloped film sitting at mum and dad’s place with oodles of lost memories on them. The thing is, how do I go about finding them? Gah…

I’m not worried that I’ll suffer dementia (yet) but it would be nice to be able to reflect upon things I’ve done in pictures. For now I guess I will have to settle for a raid of mum’s cupboard where I might find some pictures of me in all my scrunchie-wearing glory.

A rose by any other name…

Who would have thought that you could have so many different types of roses… and so many hues of white… it’s enough to make me go back to art class and really pay more attention.

I am considering flowers for my wedding and it’s a much arduous job than I anticipated – the depth of colours, the type of greenery to complement the bloom, the shape and size of the petals…

I don’t envy florists and I think what they can do is simply brilliant! Ben’s cousin Jess is doing our flowers for the wedding and she really does have her work cut out for her. I’ve decided to let the sweet little old lady at the parish office look after the church arrangements so that Jess doesn’t stress too much (aren’t I a considerate bride?)

Feel free to post some comments about the type of flower arrangements you did at your wedding (or if you’re not married, what you would do) and why you chose a particular flower – I just think roses are so romantic and work perfectly at a wedding (some would say boring, but I don’t give a hoot really).

Can you commit?

With wedding fever in the air at the moment, it has really got me thinking about commitment and making the decision to stick with something or someone for the long haul.

I think commitment is a wonderful thing - saying to yourself 'yep this is too much of a good thing for me to give up, so I'm going to hold on to it', and I am a big believer in it.

When my fiancée and I recently met with the priest who would be marrying us, he questioned us about our commitment to each other, asking questions like 'do you promise to love one another' and 'are you committed to this marriage in the eyes of God' etc. It's such a personal thing, and to hear yourself say the words out loud 'I do' seems to cement it even more so.

Father even asked us if we'd had the chance to be with other people (after we told him we'd been together for ten years this year) and even though some couples spend time apart to get their priorities straight, I think in your heart that it's the unwavering commitment you have made to that person that brings you back together. It's hard to forget.

I think the same goes for some other relationships, like a friendship that has lasted for years, but had seemingly dried up due to busy lives and no time to catch up and have a coffee. It's the history and the ties that bind you with that other person that can help to revive a special friendship. You never forget what you had and the level of commitment you had to each other.

As we enter the new financial year and it's all business, finances, taxes and a new marketing scheme for my company, I find myself thinking about my commitment to my work ethic. I have always wanted to be a journalist and even though times have been a little tough lately (I will blame the GFC) I have re-confirmed to myself that even though I may not always be in the media industry, I will always be committed to writing. It’s a passion that I’m not willing to give up for anything.

Commitment to making change is an admirable thing.

I admire people who are committed to quitting a bad habit whether it be smoking, gambling or the drink – making that decision to make your life better in some way isn’t always as easy as it sounds.

I guess that some people have larger commitments than others, but that hardly matters in the big scheme of thing. I think anyone prepared to make a commitment to something, big or small, is a pact that we make with ourselves that we will stick it out no matter the stormy weather.