Why not celebrate love every day?

Today is Valentine’s Day and of course, it has got me thinking about love.

My husband and I don’t really do anything special for this day, but we used to when our relationship was young, which is really the group of people (those in new relationships) who I think really make the most of Valentine’s Day.

Ben says that we often do nice things for each other and with each other and that we don’t need just one day to express our love for each other, and I couldn’t agree with him more. Hey, we are married and a beautiful baby girl… there is a lot of love in our life and it’s evident every day - I don’t need a box of chocolates and red roses to know I am loved. Also, I tend to think of Valentine’s Day as more of a clever marketing campaign on steroids than a day to express genuine, unwavering love for someone.

It got me thinking that I am so lucky to have so much real love in my life and that I get to experience it on a daily basis. I think falling in love, whether it be with a special someone, your newborn baby, a puppy, or even a fantastic pair of heels (hey I know girls who go weak at the knees for a fabulous pair of shoes), is one of the best feelings in the world. Having something or someone to love and cherish is a wonderful thing.

In 2010 when my husband and I got married, we used a quote on the front of our wedding invitations that read “the greatest thing in life is to love, and be loved”. This is one of my favourite quotes and I really do believe it to be true.

So on days like this, when love is at the forefront of many people’s minds, I think how lucky I am to have true, meaningful love in my life every single day. I am a bit of a romantic, but nothing says love like a person who will stick by you at your worst and your best and still be there for you at the end of the day.

To my husband Ben, having you to love is the best thing ever and I am a very blessed to have your love in return. 

Life changing...

Four weeks ago today our lives changed completely - our daughter, Grace Olivia, was born and since then life as we know it is forever different in the best way possible. She has already brought us so much happiness and laughter and we can’t wait to get to know our little princess better as she continues to grow and bring light to our lives. I didn’t think I could love something so much, but your heart immediately gets bigger the moment you are handed your first born child - it’s the best feeling in the world.

A matter of opinon

Unless you're my doctor, family, or a friend, keep your opinion to yourself!

As I am sure many pregnant women will attest, getting every second person’s opinion on your unborn can be highly frustrating. And by this I mean every second stranger's opinion.

In my current state, mine, my husband’s and my obstetrician’s opinion are the only ones that count at the moment. And after that, once the baby arrives, we’ll take opinions and try things out, but at the end of the day it will be our decision on how to raise it, what things to try etc.

Yesterday, some bogan Barbie who worked at a newsagent decided to tell me in no uncertain terms that I was going to have a huge baby and that I would need all the luck I could get. This is pretty much how the conversation went:

Me: Hi, just the two cards thanks.

Bogan Barbie: Sure (scanning and entering stuff in computer). So when are you due?
Me: In six weeks.
Bogan Barbie: (Cue dramatic eye roll) Oh wow, is it your first? You’re quite big; your baby is going to be huge. Don’t they like, grow heaps in the last four weeks?
Me: Yes it’s our first and the baby is healthy, which is all that matters.
Bogan Barbie: Well, good luck, you’re going to need it.
Me: Thanks.

Gee, thanks for that bit of helpful input, are you a doctor that just moonlights as a rude chick that works at an Ashmore newsagency? You don't even know me!

I didn’t tell her that I thought she should go and see a dermatologist for her awful patchy skin and smoker’s lines all over her face. Nor did I tell her that she was in dire need of a trip to the hairdresser. I just walked away.

I’ve also been told by people who obviously just like the sound of their own voices, what sex my baby will be and how tired I look. Well, considering I AM PREGNANT and due in six weeks, I am not surprised I look tired, because I am! You would think that people should be trying to be overly nice to pregnant women and tell them they look fantastic even if you don’t feel or look it.

I had a business meeting this week at the workplace of a good friend of mine and as I walked in the office she said “Hi Ash, how are you? You look great!” – it was just the boost I needed.

I think hitting the awkward phase of the pregnancy has affected me more than I thought it would. It is hard to sleep, sit, get comfortable in any position and don’t even talk about my inability to dry myself properly, shave my legs or do up shoes… and on top of all that I have to endure the comments of imbeciles who think nothing of sharing their thoughts about me or how it is delivered.

The blessing is that I know in a few small weeks, it will all be over and we will finally get to meet Baby V.  

So for now, unless you’re a friend or family member, keep your opinions to yourself (if they aren’t of a constructive nature) because this pregnant woman may just unleash her inner crazy at you – and that, I can assure, will not be pretty.

Happy to help

I feel like I have the words ‘fragile pregnant lady’ scrawled across my forehead and have come to accept that that’s not such a bad thing.   

Since my belly has ‘popped’ and it is obvious to everyone that I am expecting, I have had people falling over themselves to help me out.

Last week, I had the feral job of doing a mass office supplies shop at OfficeWorks. I had three bags and a box to wrangle to the car. Unfortunately one of the bags I had fell to the ground, the contents spilling out everywhere.

Immediately a helpful young lad who was walking into the store stopped and helped me pick up my wares and asked me if he could help take my bags to the car for me. I politely declined but thanked him very much for stopping and for the offer.

I don’t know why but even though I know I am pregnant and I know people want to help me, I feel bad accepting their offer.

So I decided to get over it and accept some kindness!

A few days after the OfficeWorks incident, I did some grocery shopping at Ferry Rd Markets. I had 4 bags and a carton of sparkling water and no trolley (because my baby brain forgot to get one as I walked in).

The check-out chick looked at me and said “I’ll get one of our guys to help take your bags to your car for you” and as much as I wanted to say “no, it’s okay” I told her thank you very much. Quick as a flash, she commissioned one of her male co-workers to be my pack-horse and we were on our way.

He even made small talk about when I was due and was I finding out the sex? He then told me about his nine-month old daughter who had changed his life and how he couldn’t remember anything about life before she was born. Very sweet!

This morning was another example – I had our refurbished nursery furniture delivered to our house. I would usually have helped unload the pieces out of the van, but I just sat back and watched as they were unloaded and taken into our house by the painter and her assistant.

So all in all, I have found that I am actually pretty happy to be ‘fragile pregnant lady’ and grateful for the assistance I’ve been given to date. I know I can only milk it for so long, so I may as well make the most of it hey!?

WARNING: Hormonal

I am on an emotional roller coaster at the moment, and I can’t wait until it stops. That is the only way I can describe how I am feeling at the moment, and I can’t even be bothered wording it differently so awful clichés will have to suffice.


My hormones are going crazy, and in turn, making the people around me crazy as they try to deal with my wild mood swings, tears and tantrums. Oh yes, pregnancy can be a b*tch.

The smallest thing is enough to set me off… and don’t even talk to me about work at the moment – that’s just been thrown in the too hard basket.

I think I need to get myself one of these shirts...

I get sent weekly email updates from the Huggies people, detailing mine and the baby’s physical and emotional changes. They are pretty interesting and most of the time, quite accurate.

This week the following two paragraphs are especially relevant to my situation:

You could find yourself feeling more emotional than you usually are, with situations or stories really affecting you. Watching the news can bring on a fresh outbreak of tears, not to mention walking past a new baby in its pram.

If you’ve always prided yourself on being very disciplined about your eating and exercise habits, being 24 weeks pregnant may come as a rude shock. You’re hungry, tired and feeling as if you really couldn’t be bothered keeping up your usual routines. Guess what? You don’t have to. Give yourself a break and ease into what should be a reasonably relaxing time. Pregnancy is not a performance based state, nor can it be graded into high, average or low achievement. Trying to intellectualise your symptoms or why you are feeling as you do will just sap valuable energy from what should be an easy time. So keep a supply of treats in the pantry and reach for them if you’re feeling low.

I especially like that bit at the end there talking about the supply of treats in the pantry – hey if the good people at Huggies say I should be treating myself to make me feel better, then pass me another chocolate chip cookie.

But seriously, I have got to say, I do not love being an emotional wreck. I have been a cow to my husband and my dad, the two men who (sadly for them) have to deal with me day in, day out at home and work. I hope they realise that it’s not the real me, just the mega-hormonal, tired and cranky version of me who really feels pretty rotten about most things in the world at the moment.

All I can say is that I am sorry and I hope you understand – this too shall pass.

Making every day a productive one

There is nothing like a bit of productivity to make you feel good.

I love doing mundane tasks just so I don’t have to think/worry about them – getting things done and off my plate gives me a bazaar boost.

I am sure I have mentioned before that I love writing ‘to do’ lists. Today my list consisted of a few things:

• Book in baby shower venue and confirm preliminary details           
• Draft baby shower invitee list
• Change our dog’s address with the GCCC
• Change my dog’s veterinarian appointment 
• Contact furniture refurbisher about glamming up some pieces of pine furniture for the baby’s nursery
• Go to Medicare

I managed to fit this all in while completing a very busy day in the office and sending out multiple stories to clients for approval, billing out accounts and making appointments. All in a day’s work…

Over the weekend I bought paint and brushes to start work on decorating the nursery, organised what artwork and craft projects I wanted to start, which would feature in the room and did several hours’ research on baby products, furniture for the house, textiles and landscaping ideas for the backyard.

What was a little daunting was thinking about actually completing these tasks with a newborn baby. Thank god for time (hey I have another 20 weeks up my sleeve) and the fact that I work with my dad and am able to take some time off work after the little one arrives… maternity leave is a god-send.

Today I also had some other more emotional priorities to take care of.

These included touching base with some friends I hadn’t spoken to in a little while to let them know I’m thinking of them, sending texts and emails to family to let them know how everything is going with the baby and telling them to stop going overboard with presents and embroided clothing for the baby (this was specifically directed at my grandmother who is busy creating gorgeous garments for the baby, whose sex we aren’t finding out).

I also took a moment while driving to work to make a promise to myself to stress less this week and concentrate on my big picture priorities, which is my growing family.

It gives me a great sense of satisfaction to know that I have made the effort and was able to tick several things off my ‘list’ – it sounds strange but I’ll go home tonight feeling much lighter after culling several items off it.

Tomorrow will be a new day and a new list.

 

                                        

A few things I have to smile about right now...

It is so easy to get caught up on negative things so I have decided to dedicate this post to a few things that are bringing a smile to my face at the moment - it really is the simple things in life (in my case) that are the best things.

Our pregnancy announcement

It is so great to finally be able to talk about our pregnancy with everyone – the pressure of having such a big secret like that was torture! We had to make our families take an oath that they wouldn’t say anything until we were given the ‘all clear’ from our doctors and now that we have, it’s going to be pretty hard for me to shut up about it! Being pregnant is a blessing and it is great to be able to share it with our loved ones.

The benefits of being pregnant

As well as being able to tell the world about how happy we are to be adding to our family, I have been incredibly lucky to have had no nasty side-effects from being pregnant (touch wood!). My hair and nails have never looked better and are growing at an astronomical rate, I’m eating the healthiest I’ve ever eaten and I love the fact that after cutting out caffeine and alcohol all together that I don’t miss it at all.

My friend Kate

Even though she is moving away from her family, friends and the sunny beaches of the Gold Coast to live it up in the cool, cosmopolitan capital of Victoria, my friend Kate always makes me happy. She was one of my bridesmaids when I got married (and flew all the way here from Dubai for it I might add!) and has always been a great buddy. Unfortunately she hasn’t had the best few months lately and is making a city change to Melbourne in a couple of weeks, but I am so impressed with her courage and poise, especially during the hard times. I will miss her but I know she’s destined for great things!

Sale time

I have become somewhat of an expert in bargain shopping (online or in-store) so much so that I am sure A Current Affair or a similar program is going to get wind of this and ask me for shopping tips to share with their audiences. I have been trawling eBay of late for specific items that I really just can’t justify paying full price for and I’ve found some gems. I’ve kept an ear out for any great deals in the EOFY (end of financial year) sales around the place and picked up some bargain items for the house and some beautiful items for the baby. I’ve been reporting my money-saving tips to my husband, who I think is pretty impressed with my sudden urge to save every dollar!

My dog Charlie

This dog has personality plus! He might drive us nuts at times, but Charlie is the best thing about coming home after a crappy day. His unconditional love for Ben and I is so endearing and his genuine affection for all his stuffed toys (of which we have adopted names for) is the cutest thing – this dog really has given us some valid parents-to-be training and always brings a smile to my dial.

 Cooking up a storm

I love it when I come across a fantastic recipe to add to my repertoire. Today for instance, I found one for almond and berry smoothies, which sounds like it is full of flavour, antioxidants and lots of healthy things! I am keen to try it out (and will share recipe in due course).

TV = chilled out

Something simple, but I love it when there are good things to look forward to on TV. For instance, this week is the State of Origin decider game, which my husband and I can’t wait to watch. It may seem lame, but coming home after a long day and realising there is something great on TV that night is sometimes just the thing I need to relax and zone out.

The hot sun on a winter’s day

Nothing beats this when you’re sniffling and cold indoors – the winter sun feels as though it has real healing properties. Winter isn’t the best of seasons (apart from the seasonal fashion, there isn’t much I love about it) so I’ve been making the most of the warming glow I get when I sit outside to eat breakfast in the morning or take the dog for a walk in the afternoon. Yesterday we had lunch by the beach with a couple of friends enjoying the fresh air and afternoon sun. Feeling cosy and warm when you would otherwise be cold is the best!